Tangerine Love

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for lapis blue laughter to fill the room

prickled my tangerine love, I’m

sorry if this feels like too soon, my heart

but I’m giving it all that I’ve got

 

sometimes it feels like I’m walking backwards 

but we walked for hours that day

Now I'm further forward than I have been before 

I’m still twirling my thumbs and keep 

hesitating

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Bend bruising my knees by the silver moon

Grapple with sane sanctuaries in my mind

I'm alive for just a glimpse of all time

to move on I’m too proud, still skin deep and four feet off the ground 

 

I just ate chocolate cake at 9am 

but nothing for years before then

keep cutting my fringe back to fit my face

now I’m counting my crutches and a hand full of aces 

 

Words fascinate me, intangible things

like sugar on lemon so sweet but it stings

and I’m out of breath trying to do the right thing all the time 

 

So I hugged my mum until the pain went away 

We cooked up sweet rice yesterday 

the greenery around me, gave me the ground 

These are all the things that have become me

until now